I need space to share my story. 

I am an open book. You don’t have to guess with me. If I’m sad, you’ll see it. If I’m happy, I show it. If I’m angry, oh gosh you’ll know it.

If something important happens in my life, the people in my life always hear about it.

But I’ve been noticing a trend lately, that sadly in some ways makes me feel like I might regret sharing the trials and tribulations of life with those in my circle.

Here’s what’s up:

I am finding that when I share challenges with friends and family, they are quick to become ‘fixers‘. They jump straight into giving me advice on how I should get out of said situation. They get right into telling me how I need to take action!

It’s strange to me to assume that I don’t know how to get out of a challenge in my life just because I’m sharing it with someone.

Honestly, I just need to vent. I just need someone to say “ya that sucks” or “OMGGGGG” or “tell me more” or “thank you for sharing”. I need active listening. I need to speak to be heard.

I don’t need another person to be my solution.

You know, even in crises, big or small, I still manage to keep my wits about me. I can still think creatively and come up with an action plan.

When I tell someone what’s going on with me and they automatically go into fixing-mode, it really turns me off from sharing with them. It makes me feel as though they are completely skipping over really hearing me. It makes me feel like they don’t care enough to hear the whole story, they just want to throw solutions at me until I stop talking about it.

I know it’s not their fault. The onus is on me to let people know what I need from them. I am definitely getting better at creating understanding and boundaries with others.

There will be times in my life where I need help and advice. I find no shame in this and will absolutely ask for these things when I need them. Otherwise all I need is an ear.

I need space to share my story.

Grant me that and I will be forever grateful!

Thank you readers for ‘listening’ today!


Posted

in

by

Comments

4 responses to “I need space to share my story. ”

  1. Smartygirl41 Avatar
    Smartygirl41

    Active listening is definitely not an easy skill for most people. Thank you for the post, it’s a great reminder on how to be a good listener.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. acquiescent72 Avatar
    acquiescent72

    I’m just reading and taking it in… 😉

    Liked by 1 person

    1. jlstanding Avatar

      So thankful for that!!

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Discoverecovery Avatar
    Discoverecovery

    I can completely relate to this! I’m one of those people who needs to vent about a problem when I’m stressed out or worrying just so that I can get things off of my chest and feel better. But that doesn’t mean that I don’t know how to make my own decisions and come up with my own solutions. I think a lot of people confuse the need for someone to talk to with helplessness.
    This is actually one of the reasons that I started blogging. It’s great to have a place where I can get things off of my chest without people jumping in and trying to be the hero with all of the solutions.
    Thanks for sharing! Listening is so important!

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a comment