I find this time of year to be so interesting. It’s spring. It’s supposed to be a time of cleansing, releasing, growing, and change. A time to bloom.
But I never feel like I’m blooming this time of year… I feel like I’m… flailing. Falling? Like I’m floating through space trying to grab a hold of something, but the Universe is sucking me through too fast.
I know, I know, it’s a student thing. And soon I’ll feel the sweet release of it being over. Exams will be completed. Assignments finished. I’ll move on with my life. I’ll land, somewhere, soon.
The thing about pursuing something that you really care about is that you completely invest yourself. And when you completely invest yourself, the stakes are high. And when the stakes are high, your nerves are a wreck.
What I’m trying to say is that I guess that these feelings that I have are normal.
So moving forward, I choose to embrace it. The highs, the lows, the good, the bad, everything.
If you’ve been following for a bit now, you know that I am only about a month away from my last day of classes as I pursue my education to become Certified in Holistic Nutrition. I’m so close… I can feel it!
In terms of my lifestyle, I truly can’t complain. I’ve been working extra hard to fit in my workouts, even going now often in the morning before classes. But I find it gives me more energy throughout the day, so it’s been a welcome change. I’ve been nourishing my body with lots of whole foods, but lately I’ve been obsessed with organic tofu and romaine lettuce – sometimes I feel like I’m mostly living off that – but don’t worry I fit in lots of other yummy stuff too!
I wish that taking care of yourself automatically equaled self love, but like most other things in life I find that loving myself is more of a working practice than anything. It’s not something I have, but rather something I do. I think that’s the way it is for most people. After all, lets boil it down: we live in a society where loving ourselves is so hard. We are bombarded by media constantly telling us why and how we aren’t good enough. Thanks to social media, we can now compare every inch of ourselves to another. It’s so easy to spiral out of control – to feel like we aren’t good enough.
I’m committed to loving myself this summer no matter how my bikini fits. And I know it sounds cliche and simple… but is it? I know I haven’t struggled with self love and body image to the degree that many have, but I can still appreciate the hardships of it.
I don’t always summarize my monthly updates but since my thoughts are all over the place today, I want to leave you with this:
My focus right now is to overcome everything with love. Overcome stress. Overcome perfectionism. Overcome thoughts of unworthiness and worry. Overcome comparison. Overcome each and every single negative thing by burying it in a mountain-sized pile of absolute unconditional love.
I know it’s in me to give! I know my currency is love and kindness.
I love you all for sticking with me through all the humps and bumps over the years – may I be blessed with many more highs and lows to come!
What are you guys looking forward to right now?
2 responses to “May Update”
I’m looking forward to finishing out this school year! I’m a freshman in university and it feels like I just started a couple weeks ago but I’m on the cusp of completing my first year! I can totally relate to how stressful and demanding student life is right now. I have two essays, two presentations, and a book to read and it’s all happening at once! 😫
I’m looking forward to making a gallery wall with my boyfriend! We don’t have any photos of us up in the house & we want to fix that :))