I originally thought I was interested in psychology simply out of my interest in people. As a student, I realized my interest comes down to more than that. What I’m really interested in is what drives people, what motivates them. What makes us different. No really, what makes us different? What separates the people who are just going through the motions in life from those who are truly being, and growing. Why are some people successful, and some aren’t?
Believing in yourself is a big component here. Unless you truly believe that your goal is attainable, you won’t even try. Why would you? No one in their right mind would put effort into something they were sure wasn’t going to work. The thing is, we are always so “sure” without being sure. We are quick to dismiss ourselves as not good enough, or even quicker to dismiss it as a problem with our “situation”. We blame the external world, we feel held back, we say “I would do it but…”.
This is where the truth comes out. There is something at play here that is much bigger than just believing. Before we can believe, we have to let go of the fear that holds us back. Fear of failing, fear of falling, fear that it won’t work out. Fear is paralyzing.
Take a moment to think about something you wish you would have done, but were too afraid.
Think about what would have happened if you had done it.
I can’t even begin to list the amazing things I would have done in life if I hadn’t let fear hold me back in my early years. I would have jumped at every opportunity that came along; instead, I shied away. I was a “can’t” person. Sometimes my “can’ts” were about me. I’m not skilled enough, I’m not capable, it will never work out. Sometimes I blamed the external. I don’t have enough support, it’s not the right time, this is a stupid idea. It’s all garbage. I was afraid. I was worried that it wouldn’t work out and I would look like a fool.
More than that, I was worried that it would.
In society today, people are so comfortable with mediocrity that the idea of actually being successful makes us uncomfortable. What if it does work out. What if I do make it. What if my relationship/new business/academic venture/travel plans actually work out? We never expect for good things to happen to us, but we always expect the bad. When the bad comes, we say “that’s life”. When the good comes, we say “this isn’t meant for me” and we run.
Don’t be afraid. If by chance you fail, it means you tried. There is absolutely no shame in that.
But I think you just might surprise yourself.
I think you can do it; that thing that you are so afraid of. And don’t say you aren’t scared, you are scared. The majority of people make decisions based on fear every single day. It’s normal, but it doesn’t mean it’s right. Stop holding yourself back from that thing that is meant and waiting for you.
You deserve happiness and you deserve success. You are worthy. There is nothing to be afraid of but fear itself.
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?” – Marianne Williamson